A half sloved riddle

Insomnia

Time is a funny thing

especially if you don't keep track of if

Daylight

Nightdark

all the same

Like that study I read about

a long time ago

I laughed at it
Like so many other things,

rythm of sleep changing
without clocks.

Yeah, that's what it said.
Now I know not to laugh -

time is not a thing

Time is the space that passes

between phonecalls

and texts

"Are you alright?"

"What are you doing?"

"Want to do something?"

I don't know

I try to explain to them,

that it feels like I'm being lied to

And they laugh, uncomfortably

like I did with that study

I wish I could find it again

I think it was conducted in

hm, a cave

My memory might fail me,

it's been such a long time.

At least ten thousand

phonecalls ago

Like a rebel, with a trustfund

I question society's rules

growling
Saw a documentary

about an artist, he said:

"Parades make me sad,

I'm such an outsider

and this expression

of belonging makes it
feel worse. Like

I'll never belong"

I didn't laugh this time

My cat asked for food

I'd never forget to feed

them,

They don't care about

time.

Still they remind me of it,

with their hunger

and excraments

I wonder if it'd be

even worse

Maybe without them

I'd know how to answer

"What are you doing?"

"How are you?"

"Want to do something?"

I'd always answer no

I'm not doing anything -

nothing I put my mind to

I'd really like to find that study.

It irks me that I can't.

It spoke to the history in me

of owning the hours.

Daydark

Nightlight

Like watching life is watching

shadows

"Going through the motions"

it's not the industrial era

not anymore

What makes me a better person

to be up at dawn?

I am however up with the sun

I'm up at any hour

It doesn't matter what time.

It's not jealousy

but a wish to be content

A sheer knowledge of

my time well spent.

Rebels keeping

up with their neighbours

I tried that too

the house

the car

the pets
the spouse

(not the child)

It wasn't all that bad

But time is a funny thing

Especially when you can't keep track

of morgages

of dinnertime

not even the slightest snack

Roses on wet

petal bow

Words I never said

Never went to Mallorca

or that tax free shopping boat

I like words instead

Not the perfect ones

that'd be so unlike me

but those

uneven ones

Rhyming at times

But usually I let them be
Watching like is like watching

shadows, was it Plato

that said so?

I want to see the purest

forms

Time is waiting for death

Best not keep track of it

but just be instead.