Dumbo

It wasn't that long ago I realized just how old the movie Dumbo is. The marketing department of Disney is doing great work, as it wasn't long after that realization it was rereleased on dvd, and ever since I heard that I've been having a whiny little voice in me wanting to get it. What my little whiny voice tells me usually leaks whininess out of my mouth so here I am, fresh from watching it. I do understand whole heartedly why it made me cry when I was a child, it still does. The scene where he happily walks up to the children that are mocking him, simply because he doesn't understand it breaks my heart. It never fails.

Isn't that the perfect example of what we all fear in the emotional retardedness in the world? To walk into it, unguarded and unexpectedly being the one laughed at, the one excluded and the joke told. Or maybe not all of us fear it at all, perhaps some never think like that and deem me weird for shattering when I sense a repulsive atmosphere of mockery. When I interrupt a topic even when I've been quiet because I feel that brick wall approaching or how my stomach turns when I see a child walking with its head bent in front of a group of other kids. Only those ones that have been in that position knows it's always worse to walk in front than after. Walking behind you know what they're doing and if they're looking at you, if you walk in front you don't have that luxury, nor do you know if you can turn around and see if they're still there.

My claws come out and I growl from voids I don't like exposing when I can do something about it. I make it a point to speak to those who aren't spoken to and stand in the way if I can to take the heat. It's at those times when I know that an "it's ok, it's not your fault" would be too much, and a "hello" would be too little I want to tear my hair out.

I've read too much on bullying and I don't care about the argument of that it's the offender that's the real victim, and that they learn that behaviour from home. It's sad yes, but being treated badly is never an excuse for doing the same thing to someone else. The classic idea of two wrongs don't make a right. Some lack the depth of understanding how others feel. If you don't like something done to you, why on earth would you want to put someone else through that? Is it the whole misery loves company bit? And oh yes, I wish I could say it's "just" children, we all know it's not true. It happens everywhere, at universities, workplaces, online communities and sports clubs. There are times where I doubt that mankind is capable of in fact being kind.

Being sweet will never get you half as far in life as being mean, but I much rather be able to live with myself and up to my own ideals, I just can't ignore that stabbing feeling or faces turned around, a person trying to turn the other cheek even if the cheeks are vastly outnumbered by the amount of slaps handed out by those who just couldn't care less. There are many ways to break someone's spirit and that's a crime I hope I never commit. If I've done it to you, I apologize and I'm truly sorry.