It’s only wrong when it’s done to you, not by you

I had the pleasure of watching the traffic going by, and I couldn’t help by re-noticing the amount of honking horns. Cars getting honked at for being too slow, or taking a shot at the car going straight wouldn’t make it to the crossing before they turned themselves. Then I thought, my goodness isn’t it self-righteous to get annoyed by that? It’s hardly like you’ve never done it yourself! I suppose we all do it when we drive, those little things we’re not really supposed to do, just because we don’t want to wait, and that other car seems to be slowing down so gogogogo. Occasionally there’s some poutyhead that’ll honk about it, but meh. Also, I noticed that cars tended to speed up only so that the car in the wrong would notice it fully, then of course the sound of that horn. The likelihood of the one in the right having at some point doing exactly the same is pretty high. I know I've been on both sides. But I can guarantee you, I have never honked just because someone wanted out of the street in order to not have to wait for the next green light. So, why is it that something’s only wrong when it’s done to us, not by us?

It’s fine when you don’t call your friends, you’re busy after all, but if your friends don’t call you they’re being selfish. It’s fine when you go on vacation and leave your workload to your co-workers, but you whine when you have to do theirs when they’re away. It’s unfair when the store won’t take your expired coupon, but it serves anyone else right, they should have checked the date better. It’s horrible to have your own heart broken, but breaking someone else’s is just part of life, you didn’t intend to be mean did you? Of course the clerk should stay at work for an extra 10 minutes so that you can get your stuff, but you’re out the door a minute before your shift ends.

In a way I suppose that’s the core of things again, how selfish we are. We want it simple and beneficial. Perhaps we could be as generous as we are selfish and let others get those things we want for ourselves. What does it really matter if you show up a minute later because someone was driving too slowly, or what does it matter if you have to wait ‘til the next day to shop for the things you don’t really need in the first place? Those things with strangers surely even out in the long run. Sometimes you’re the one in the wrong, sometimes you’re the one in the right. Sometimes you’re the one that gets the benefit, sometimes you’re not. Plain and simple.

When it comes to people you know, you just have to make sure you like them enough to give something up for them and allow them the time to be a bit odd and forgive them for their shortcomings. Noone’s perfect, not even you. Again, it’s all in being considerate, not even if our behaviour towards others is flawless can we expect the same in return. Not even if there are proper rules to follow can we expect everyone to follow them. Think of it as a game where your kindness should always have more boxes checked than when you were given the benefit.

So, dear drivers I watched, those who honked, please untwist your knickers and smile, it’ll all come out fine in the end.